Three-ish Weeks of Noticing Stuff

This Friday marks the third week that I've been in beautiful Bermuda!

In that time, I have learned a lot of things about the ways of the island. Some things, not worth sharing, others, here ye be:

1. Taxi's only take cash. I still have no idea how much to tip. I'm pretty sure that I'm overdoing it.

2. The vast majority of restaurants add a 15%-18% gratuity, whether you like it/them/him/her or not. Quite sure I tipped a woman 35% one night, not having a clue of this lovely custom. Lesson learned!

3. When someone says "good morning" or "good afternoon", it would behoove you to reciprocate.

4. American dollars are accepted as equivalent to Bermudian, but Bermudian is so much prettier!

5. There are a lot of ants. All of the time. Everywhere. Wash everything that food may have touched and put it away immediately. And for the love of all good things, do not look them directly in the eye.

6. The ferry and bus routes still confuse me. Perhaps I shouldn't be allowed out (www.gov.bm, tell me that bus schedule isn't a little whackadoodle).

7. There's a very smart woman here who created this www.nothingtodoinbermuda.com. There are also other smart women, but this woman stands out.

8. Pearl, a sushi place, will make you cry rainbows of happiness out of your taste buds.

9. Cruise ships come in every day on different part of the island, unleashing angry Americans, for the most part, who don't want to pay the Bermudian prices for coffee that is located directly off of their cruise ship. Did they not think that perhaps Bermuda has figured out that tourists come here, all of the time, and has possibly done what every other tourist city has, and chosen to create what is called a "tourist trap"? Are the Americans immune, these cruise ship folk with their way-too-tiny-bathingsuits, to these conventions of vacationing? Shut up and order your $6 latte so that I can get my $12 chicken wrap. Move.

10. Miles grocery store is delicious (it's the Pusateri's of Bermuda). Their roast beef cold cuts are from a freshly made roast beef, with just enough pink on the inside. If the next time you see me I have a piece of roast beef hanging out of my face, it's best to assume that it's just what I look like now.

11. The beaches either charge for chairs and umbrella's or they don't have them at all. Either get ready for some pretty uncomfortable butt-crack anger, or bring a big, fun beach towel. My towel is orange!

12. If you go to a restaurant and ask for "water", be prepared to pay approximately $9 for a bottle of fancypants water. It would behoove (second use of the word, thank you) you to ask specifically for "tap" water. You may get a look, but sometimes a look is worth saving $9.

13. Sunscreen should be so your best friend, that it sleeps over when you're nine and you fight about which movie to watch.

14. Every Wednesday night is Harbour Nights on Front St. in Hamilton. This consists of a stage with a 60 year old man gyrating (at least tonight... it was interesting), but for the most part they close the road down around 6pm, and vendors sell food, jewelry, bags, clothes, lots of stuff. It appears to be every Wednesday until September. Party!

15. Happy hour appears to occur every night at 5pm. Everywhere. It's quite impressive, actually.

16. The Rum Swizzle is a popular drink, which can apparently sneak up on you, due to all of the "hidden" rum. I had one, milked it for three hours, so, not so much for me. Plus the gigantism, you know.

17. I saw a woman get off of a cruise ship today, walk by human beings (I point that out because she was more than aware that real eyes could see her), with literally half of each ass-cheek hanging out of her cut-off jean shorts. A note, people work here, people live here, try to have half an ounce of respect for the fact that this is a city where people and children use their eyes, all of the day long.

18. Don't go to the bank on lunch hour. By some confusing confuffle of human logic here in Bermuda, almost everyone in the bank will be on lunch at the same time as you are. If you feel like being "huff and puff" buddies with a bunch of anxious people in an anger line, give it a go!

19. If you don't ride a scooter (known here as a bike), expect to get hit by one. They are everywhere. I haven't been hit yet, but I'm becoming quite the scooter-dodger (coined it!)

20. A sidewalk here is the equivalent to a life-saver on a tiny, banged-up boat in the middle of the Atlantic, during a massive storm. Grab hold of that mother for as long as it's available to you. When it's gone, say your prayers.

And with that, I leave you to memorize all of this for when you visit me :D

The Sounds

This will be a short post. The sounds of Bermuda are, well, new to me! I have no idea what is making these sounds, but it's taken me a while to get used to. Sleep is difficult with the high-pitchness!

This is a video, but only for the purposes of the audio, though I do like the yellow houses in the shot.

Sunday Funday

I had no idea what to do today. I woke up, my neck hurt and it was threatening to rain outside. Regardless of those things, I decided that I was going to head over to the movie theatre that was playing Prometheus, and see what Bermuda movie theatres were all about.

I headed over to Dockyard (again... yes, I appear to love that part of the island), and got some lunch at a place called The Frog and Onion. I ordered the Bermuda seafood chowder. It's the third chowder that I've had here, and they all seem to be almost identical. They're all red, have a lot of small chunks of fish (likely salmon), and they taste like chicken. It's weird. There's also this ritual that you're expected to follow with Sherry Pepper Sauce and Black Rum. They both come in separate bottles when you order the chowder. I had no idea what was happening when they brought it over the first time, but, it did add some interesting flavours. Flavours that I'd never tasted, but flavours nonetheless.

One thing I will say, I have not yet found a well-done (not in a cooked way) calamari. I love my calamari, have had it three times here, and have been disappointed three times.

I will keep searching, and I will report back!

Anyhow, the day became too beautiful to sit in a movie theatre, so I went and sat at the bar by the beach, had a $4 Diet Pepsi, and listened to a live reggae band. Had a blast!

I decided to head back downtown (Hamilton), and for the first time, decided to sit at the top of the ferry. I have no idea why it took me two weeks and about ten ferry rides before I did it.

My hair, let's just not talk about that. Here are some shots of the view on the ferry. Just stunning!

It seems like every day there are cruise ships docking at Dockyards (I read in the Dockyard newspaper today that it's the only dock on the whole island that can dock the huge cruise ships). The crowds are something to see, as everyone has a different accent and they are almost all yelling at each other. So much for the vacation mentality. I was in line for the washroom at the beach, and there was a woman pushing her grandmother in a wheelchair, and her sister was screaming at her about a towel. I mean, I didn't know the whole story, but it seemed very silly. Especially looking at these views!

 

And then I saw this. What appears to be a boat that was driven up the side of a mini-island. Oh boy, that will be hard to explain!

St. George... and Sweating

Everyone kept telling me about St. George, a seemingly small town out nearish the airport. It's said to be a little , beautiful village with shops, and delicious restaurants.

I walked into town, the 2.4 kilometres to the bus station. It was 37 degrees outside. I...was...gross! The non-air-conditioned bus, for forty-five minutes, after walking that distance in that heat was not the best choice. Have you every sweat so much that you think that you may actually have a leak in your body like a blow-up crocodile from the pool when you were younger?

Anyhow, in less gross conversation, I got to St. George, and drank any water I could find. Luckily it was at a restaurant, on the patio. I drank three glasses of water and a Sprite, and finally, after 40 minutes, stopped sweating. Until I moved my arm 2 degrees to the left.

The restaurant was called The White Horse Pub. Service, not great. Food, I ate it.

The best part was the fish in the water right next to the table that a young family was sitting at. They were throwing bread into the water and the fish were jumping like crazy! I didn't get a picture, I didn't want to interrupt their lunch, but I got some other shots while I was sitting there.

It was super-humid and a bit muggy, but the view was still beautiful! There was this weird, cartoon-like boat, that I wish I could have gone for a ride on!

The above picture is what I'm choosing to call a "miracle ferry". Nothing super-miracley happened, but there weren't supposed to be a ferry at all that day, but it showed up! I walked briskly over to it, asked the dude where it was going, and it went to exactly where I was going. I ended up having a great ferry ride, listening to my headphones, and landed at Dockyard, where I ate this deeeelicious Dulce de Leche eclair. Wooooah, super-tasty!

The café is called the Pastry Shop (yeah, they could have spent another few minutes on the name). They have this delicious piece of art, and they also have a delicious carrot cake. It's gluten-free, which stopped me from getting it a couple of times, but gluten apparently didn't have to exist in it for it to be yummy! I even ate the icing, and I hate cream cheese icing!

Highly recommended!

I Can Laugh About This... Now

Getting ready to move to Bermuda was intense.

It's only after I've been able to sit on a few beaches, meet some calming people, eat some delicious food, that I can see the humour in the process.

For those involved in any way in the process of getting me here, and perhaps were around the stressed Hayley during that time, consider this an official apology. I owe you dinner when you come and visit (and I don't only mean pops and Edgar, mostly because I in fact owe you two a whole restaurant named after you, I'm working on it!).

Below is a list of what was accomplished within two weeks (again, with a lot of help):

•  Speak to Canada Revenue about all things tax and government
•  Speak to Canada Revenue again, about all things tax and government
•  Ask my father to speak to Canada Revenue about all things tax and government, with much success
•  Get a chest x-ray, on film, but not have it happen, because that doesn't exist in Toronto anymore
•  Get a chest x-ray, but not know that you need official forms (that don't exist) from your doctor
•  Get a chest x-ray, but not know that you need a passport photo to have the chest doctor sign off on it
•  Get a full doctor work-up, and a signed note from the doctor
•  Acquire a police check, but not know that it takes two weeks, when you have one week, pay for one
   anyway, with fingers crossed
•  Acquire a back-up police report in York Region that will only take ten minutes, and then learn that
   the computers are down in York Region when you drive there on a Saturday, forcing your lovely,
   patient father to go again the next day
•  Get your eyes checked, subsequently get new glasses and contacts, in a total of four appointments
•  Get a proof of graduation and degree from OCAD, without the knowledge that it takes two weeks
•  Check with OCAD six times (they loved me) throughout the ten days, and receive it just in time
•  Take the OCAD certificate, police check, passport and birth certificate to the notary public, not know
   that the day that you show up, their printer will be broken... the place that makes copies of originals,
   had a broken copier
•  Get employment and personal references (easiest part, thank you to all of you wonderful Hayley
   supporters out there!)
•  Fill out immigration paperwork, three times on a rough version so as to not mess up the actual copy
   shipped all the way from Bermuda
•  Get six passport photos, not knowing which size though, get twelve, six of each size
•  Find a place in Bermuda, and then find out that perhaps 350 square feet for $1800 is not ideal, so
   don't take the place, two days before I land in Bermuda
•  Cancel hydro, Rogers (pay the $450 cancellation fee, yeah), a credit card, insurance
•  Redirect mail
•  Call Apple to make sure that all Apple products work in Bermuda
•  Get luggage
•  Get more luggage
•  Call airline to see if I can take that much luggage
•  Pay the $215 for a second extra piece of luggage
•  Work
•  Get on a plane
•  Thank people every five seconds for getting me here safely and without to much wear and tear

With that, here is a reminder to myself as to why that is all now a funny memory.

The City

I don't know that I've ever seen green so green, or blue so blue. When I walk into town from my current hotel, I come across the most beautiful trees, abstract rocks, stunning architecture and vibrant building colours.

The one thing that I was not anticipating, though I guess it makes sense, is the lack of sidewalks. I walk into town along these naturally formed rock formation, flailing my arms about as I go around sharp corners so that the cars can see me. It's funny to watch all of the people doing the same thing, so they all seem to have a more subtle way of doing it. This is a Bermudian knowledge that I don't have. I look like I'm frantically trying to summon a taxi. People must think I'm insane.

One of the things that I didn't expect to see here was the worldwide headquarters for Bacardi! The building is beautiful, and they have this stunning water fountain/fixture/work of art out front. I met a woman who worked here when I saw a place, and she's been there forever. If you look into the building (which this picture doesn't show you, sorry...), you can see a massive metal mounted wall-piece of their logo in the entranceway. It is quite the sight to see.

These are the shots from my current hotel's window. Is that yellow building not meant for me!? I will find that building and go there one day, that I promise myself!

These guys are building a new house or some other building. I stood and watched for a few minutes, because I have always been enthralled with the building of, well, buildings. I have no idea how people do it. Mine would look like a game of Jenga after twelve beers. I also have no idea how these guys manage, because I was walking at a snails pace and sweating. They're lifting cinder-blocks for eight hours straight. They deserve a big raise!

The other thing that I've learned, which I thought was brilliant, is how they build their roofs. I noticed that there was a tapering pyramid design, and that there was a type of eavesdrop situation going on, all of which look hand-crafted. I thought that it was just the way that Bermuda did their roofs. As it turns out, the reason that this is done is that this is how Bermudians collect their water. There are tanks underneath their homes (this I'm not completely clear on), and the rain water is collected into the tanks by running down their roof structures. I've learned that if the roof is dirty, the place isn't great (to rent or visit, specifically), because that dirt then goes into the water supply for that home. In times when there isn't enough rain, the residence are able to call the water supply people (don't know the proper term, clearly), and have their tank filled, at a cost of course. Roofs are painted (I'd imagine with a certain kind of paint that doesn't poison the water) quite often, in order to keep the surface clean.

These are only two roofs in the entirely of Bermuda, they were pointed out to me by a friend while we rode the ferry across to another part of the island. Apparently those people are rich and don't need to have their water brought to them from the rain. Aren't they just the bee's knees!

This and the next photo are of the cruise ships that seem to be everywhere around Bermuda. Look in the background of the shot above, you can see the city, and then a massive cruise ship just parked right there in the middle. This ship is apparently not actually that large. To me, it looks like the Titanic, but then again, I am new.

The shot below is of a truly huge cruise ship. Look at this thing! This was at the Dockyard last weekend. That is where all of the larger ships dock while people get off and experience Bermuda as part of their vacation.

The People

It's amazing. I have never met such a kind group of people.

I was on the bus on the way back from the beach yesterday, and a 13 to 15 year old boy got on the bus, sat next to me, and promptly said "Afternoon..." and nodded his head at me. I replied the same way. Tell me that a 13 to 15 year old boy would do that in Toronto. It wouldn't happen, or at least, never did to me.

I watched as all of the kids got on the bus (it was school's-out time), and they all sat quietly, with respect for those around them, and were all nice to each other, saying "excuse me", "thank you", "good-day". Some of the kids were 5 to 7 years old, and they were just sitting there, calm, relaxed and civilized. It was amazing to watch.

I don't have a shot of the bus with the kids, it was way too cramped in there to pull out the camera, but here's a shot of the bus, on my way to the beach the day before.

And then there's the ferry. These ferries are not like what we see in Toronto to get to the islands there. These are like yacht's, well, as close to one as I'll ever get. It's $4 each way to take the ferry, or you can get an array of passes. I decided to get the $70 monthly pass, which allows you on any ferry and any bus. Seemed like a pretty sweet deal, given that if you want to leave the city (and have chosen, as I have, to avoid the death machines called "bikes", which I know as scooters) you pretty much need to use one of the two. You can of course take a cab, and the rates aren't too bad.

Here is a picture of the inside of the ferry. The guys who run the ferries are Bermudian born, and are an absolute blast!

This is a shot of the water from the back of the ferry. It was insane watching the smaller boats get the "left-overs" of the ferry as it sailed by. I would not want to be the one driving a smaller boat in the waves!

The Beaches

I've been to three beaches. The first was called Snorkel Park in the Royal Naval Dockyard. It was stunning, the pictures are under the Dockyard post. Beautiful!

The second beach was called Elbow Beach. Just beautiful. I've never seen anything like it! Here's some video of the sound and beauty of the ocean. I stood here for about 30 minutes, sinking into the sand.

Here are some pictures of the beach. When you're walking down hill to the beach (do keep in mind that you have to walk back up, good lord), all you can see is teal, pure teal and dark blue in the distance. You have to walk through the "members" beach, as people stay at the Elbow Beach Resort and Spa. These people appear to be bajillionaires, as I have no idea how else they could afford it. Anyhow, you walk through the people dripping money, and then get to the part of the beach for the "common folk". Is this is what it is to be "common", count me IN!

 

The third beach that I went to is by far the most popular on the island, I hear. It's called Horseshoe Bay (or Horseshoe Beach, it seems to be called both!?). It certainly looks like the most popular, based on all of the people. Some lunatics were climbing this huge rock formation. They are clearly out of their minds!

Also, you have to walk down a pretty substantial hill to get down to the beach from the bus stop, so a brilliant man has created a shuttle service. It consists of his van, a sign and him yelling, "Stop at the top!" He charges $2 per person, and while the walk would be 10 minutes long, it takes less than 2 to get to the top. Yes, I did give the man my money, because it was hot as all hell. He gives you a very short chat about the fact that Bermuda has the world's smallest church (the size of two of his vans), and the world's smallest drawbridge, measuring 18" across. Seems silly, but, it exists.

Here are the crazy climbers. Really, we think climbing up sharp rocks in our bathing suits is a good idea? To each their their own stupid choices, I suppose.

Dockyard

In a very uncharacteristic Hayley move, I walked up to the woman selling ferry tokens, and asked her to point me in the direction of something fun. She was confused, and not impressed. I explained that I was new, wanted to go somewhere on the ferry, and asked again where I should go. She shrugged and said, "Dockyard. It's the only place the ferry goes today."

Done. Two tokens ($4 each), and  was off! I waited by the dock for the ferry, and had a hamburger from a food truck. When I finally got it, after waiting ten minutes in the sweltering heat, with no shelter in sight, it was covered in BBQ sauce (literally, the whole thing has been dipped in barbecue sauce, maybe twice), and then slapped on a bun. Dripping, delicious, calories-galore, but the only thing I'd eaten that day, so it hit the spot.

The ferry got there and we were off! I had no idea to where, how far and who I was surrounded by, but, we left.

We arrived a half hour later with extremely wind-blown hair (not a good style for this lady), and I quickly found out that this was a massive tourist trap!

This is because this is where the cruise ships dock when they stop over in Bermuda. I have never seen such huge ships!

I soon discovered what the place was really about. It is so beautiful!

I came across a beach ($5 cover, weird but okay doke), that was very clearly a cruise ship stop-over beach. It didn't matter to me, the place was beautiful! I've since been told that this is not a real Bermuda beach, but an unimpressive, uncool, not-to-be-visited, tourist beach. I don't know about that, I think it was stunning!

Also stunning, the amount of men that thought the Speedo was a good idea. A Speedo that is two sizes too small. Good times. Except the opposite.

Anyhow, here are some of my favourite shots!

This is where I learned about the Rum Swizzle. Apparently, this is a potent drink! I had one, and milked it for three hours! It didn't affect me at all, but it's apparently quite affective with most regular-sized people, who drink like normal people, not sipping at a straw forever. The company that I was with was confused by me, as this was clearly not the way a true Bermudian does it. I was taught to shake it up with some ice after it melts. Take what's left of the drink, and toss it between a cup of ice. Brilliant way to make the three hour drink last even longer!

First Impression : Woah! (Joey Lawrence style)

I'd written this whole post about how the process getting to this point was a pain, stressful and that I would never forget it. Somehow, after being here only three days, none of that matters anymore.

The world here works on a different clock. They don't disregard the clock entirely, but they seem to have a different respect for it. People walk around like they haven't really got anywhere to be, but always appear to be on a mission. Most seem happy to be here, even the old man on the corner with three teeth and dreads.

The tourists are very clearly tourists. I can say that because, I guess technically, I am one. I'm just as uninformed as those who are popping by off of a cruise ship for an afternoon, with their miserable husbands and floppy straw hats.

There are many customs, only a few of which I have been taught.

For example, if someone says "Good morning!", you reply back, "Good morning", and then carry on with the rest of the conversation. It is seen as a sign of disrespect if you don't reciprocate with the same greeting. I've learned this a couple of times.

Everyone nods their head at each other as they pass on the street, whether they know each other or not. I have seen, in only three days, five different occasions of one person stopping, greeting and hugging someone they knew, just as their way of saying "hi" in passing.

It's endearing. It's human. It's how people should be.

This is a picture of the main street in Hamilton, called Front St. It feels like a movie set, especially on Sunday afternoon, when the whole city seems to evacuate the area!

As you can see, everything is so clean! I have no idea how it remain that way, what with the tourists coming in and out, all of the people running around. It's amazing to me. Toronto could learn something from Bermuda.

The scooters, which they call "bikes", are everywhere. Good luck stepping out of the office and making a call. All you can hear are zooming bikes. They drive on the opposite side of the road, so you have to watch the opposite side of the road when crossing. This has been an issue! I've managed, but, it catching me off guard every time. Eeek!

Here is a parking lot with all of the bikes, just in one small area.

There is parking all along the streets for bikes, and the amazing thing is that every single person wears a helmet. I mean it only makes sense, but you'd think one or two people would break the rules. Not at all. I watched today, on purpose, and not a'one!

Men hold doors open for women. Chivalry is not dead. However, it is cloaked in the most spectacularly confusing accent! I wish I could figure it out. It does seem like the "o" is pronounced like the "ou" in "you". I find myself listening so much more intently than usual to try and figure it out. I will figure it out if my name here isn't "The giant blonde chick from Toronto!"

My first impression is that I am impressed! More to come about Dockyard. Too beautiful!